Grateful

Last year many of my friends participated in a Thanksgiving challenge on their blogs. Each day in November they were to write about one thing for which they were grateful. It made my heart glad to read their entries. I haven't seen this challenge circulating this year and only thought of it when I was trying to cheer myself up this weekend. The old "Count Your Blessings" trick is pretty consistent with its results. In that spirit, I wanted to list a few of the things I am grateful for this year.

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1) My dear Hubby. He is such a great friend and companion.

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2) My four kind and interesting kids. I'm so grateful that my kids are interesting! They like to explore, go on adventures, and learn new things. Hooray!

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3) My house. I'm still getting used to it, but having four good-sized bedrooms is fabulous.

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4) Quilts! How else are you going to keep warm in the winter? And nothing beats a quilt to snuggle up in while watching a movie or hanging on your wall to beautify your home.

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5) Books. I love reading and learning. I am especially grateful that I am no longer in school and can read for pleasure again. So far I've read Beowulf, a couple of books on the 1972 Munich Olympics massacre, and Yoni's Last Battle: The Rescue at Entebbe 1976. It is wonderful to read a book, learn from it, think about and digest the content, and NOT write a five to ten page essay dissecting it!

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6) How National Adoption Day was celebrated in my little town. Our two family judges worked hard all last Friday. They conducted 30 adoptions! Isn't that wonderful? Reading the stories of a few of the families that participated made my heart happy.

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7) Trees. I adore trees. Particularly fruit trees. In my backyard alone I have a lime, lemon, grapefruit, Arizona sweet orange, tangerine, Anna apple, Dorset apple, plum, and peach tree. I had an apricot tree, but it didn't survive the Arizona summer. In the spring one of my apple trees produced three little apples. This winter, my lime tree produced one lime-which was picked prematurely-and my orange tree has about twenty oranges on it. They are currently a light orange. We have to wait a few more weeks for the orange color to deepen then they'll be ready to eat. Yum!

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8) Being outdoors. I am fascinated with the world around me. It drives my kids and Hubby nuts, but I am content sitting outside all day just observing nature. Watching the clouds drift and change, the leaves move with the wind, the birds flying overhead, insects moving in the grass, a spider building a web...I love it all!

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9) The Sonoran Desert. What a beautiful place to live. I feel so lucky to be here.

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10) Variety. Wasn't our Father in Heaven wise when he designed such a diverse earth and population. Deserts and Rain Forests. Tropical Islands and Mountain Ranges. Horses and Tigers. Elephants and Ants. And of course the variety of personalities in the peoples of this planet. It's just so interesting! I am grateful for interesting things. :)

Choosing to be Happy

I am feeling much better today than I was on Friday. So, how did I turn it around? Simply put, I chose to be happy. It was tough, but I did it. I sought out those things that lighten my load and make my heart glad.

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1) I vented. Writing the previous post, airing my feelings, helped immensely. I am a person who will dwell on things and let them fester until I explode. So writing that post was a good first step.

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2) I caught up on my friends' blogs. It was nice to read about them and see pictures of their families. One gal even had a picture from her latest ultrasound...showing her baby girl! I was excited to see that, though a tad jealous. My ultrasound tech guy only gave me a picture of my baby's boy parts, not exactly suitable for sharing on the Internet. ;)

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3) I played silly games with my boys.

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4) I watched Miss Q get ready for a night out with a bunch of great girls from Church. This is her first group of Good, Kind, Loving friends. Her enthusiasm was contagious! I was happy that she had made these friends all on her own. And proud of her for stepping outside of her comfort zone.

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5) I talked to Rose & Anne about their hopes and dreams. I am a planner by nature. Listening to other peoples plans makes me happy. And boy do they have some big dreams! It was fun to sit with them and teach them about setting small goals which will lead them in the direction they wish to go.

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6) I got my life-planning book out and looked at the next ten years. It's hard not to feel better when your looking at a calendar that charts each child's future baptism date, entrance to Young Women or Young Men, entrance into Middle School, then High School, and eventually college. I know that might sound overwhelming to some people, but remember, I'm a planner. I love seeing life mapped out, seeing the big picture of mine and my family's lives.

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7) I read silly stories and silly blog entries. I also perused the "People of Walmart" blog. I usually find that thing hilarious. This was no exception. By the time I caught up, my heart was feeling much lighter. I just hope that I never see a picture of myself on that site! That would really put me in a sad place.

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I did many other things over the weekend. This morning I woke up feeling good. And even though I had a busy Sabbath, I still feel good. Hooray!

Big Girls DO Cry!

Especially when they're pregnant!

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I am not someone who cries a lot. In fact, it is rarity for me to cry at all. Even when I'm pregnant and my hormones are raging, it is more likely that I will get grouchy with a short-fuse or start laughing like a maniac.

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But not last night.

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I was so happy. I was teaching a class at JoAnn's. The mini-quilt coaster class. Hubby decided that he and the girls didn't need to attend Annie practice. I had planned on taking the boys to a local drop-in babysitting place. With Hubby staying home, I could leave the boys home saving me money and drive time. I left the house happy. Turned on NPR to get an update on the news and got about two miles from my home before I was pulled over by a police officer.

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The officer, after freaking out because I got out of my car (my driver's side window won't roll down); refusing to tell me why he stopped me until I had given him my license, registration and my insurance; and being a bit condescending, informed me that I hadn't come to a complete stop before I turned right on a red light.

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I was floored!!! I told him that Yes! I did stop. Whatever, he didn't even seem to acknowledge my response. He'd already started walking to his vehicle. All my extra time for getting to JoAnn's to teach my class went out the window as he took his sweet time filling out a ticket. I kept looking at the clock. My class started at 6:00 pm. When the clock hit 5:50 the injustice of it all hit me and I started bawling. Not crying. Not weeping. Full on bawling.

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I was being charged with something I hadn't done. The guy was taking his sweet time writing a ticket. He was a bit rude when I was pulling out the registration and insurance info. He was making me late for class. And on top of it all, I would have to pay a stupid fine! For something I didn't do! And it's Christmas time. And Anne's turning eight this year. All of my extra money is going towards presents for those two events. I bawled even harder.

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When the clock hit 5:55, I got my cell phone out, called Hubby, and asked him to call JoAnn's to let them know I'd be late. Hubby freaked out!! He knows I never cry and he couldn't quite understand what I was saying. He thought I was in an accident. I explained what happened, hung up, and kept waiting.

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The officer finally came back to my door. He explained the ticket and my options and then asked me to sign the ticket. I was sitting in my car, he held the clipboard at my elbow. I tried to take the clipboard so I could sign, he wouldn't let the stupid thing go!!! I had to climb back out of my car just to sign the ticket because he wouldn't let go of the clipboard. Seriously! Did he think I would steal his clipboard? I mean, the guy still had my driver's license. And my car was turned off. I had to climb out of the car to sign the ticket, which was difficult because he didn't move out of my way, so I only had a little bit of space to maneuver in.

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And he kept telling me that I had run the light. Umm, no, I sure didn't. It was like a preschool fight! Ya-huh. Na-uh. Ya-huh, Na-uh. Obviously I wasn't going to agree with him, but he just couldn't let it go. I finally told him (through my tears) that I was not going to agree with him. He stated once more that I did not stop completely. Holy Cow! Talk about beating a dead horse. And he didn't even seem to care that he made a pregnant lady cry. Which of course, made me cry harder.

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Anyhoo, I did make it to class and was able to teach without falling apart anymore. But as soon as I was back in my car, I started crying again. And I have been so sad ever since. Hubby has tried to cheer me up, but nothing seems to be working. Which makes me even sadder!!

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I have an attorney in my family. I haven't ever used him before. I talked to him last night and this morning. He is going to take care of the ticket for me. He is a very nice man. But I'm still sad.

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I tried reading funny stories on-line this morning, but nothing worked. The last (and only) time I was like this was when I was pregnant with Cakes...and the sadness lasted for a whole week! I sure hope it doesn't last that long this time. I'm writing this all out here, hoping that a little venting will help me feel better. And now I'm going to go try to find something good to eat, because that usually makes me happy. Wish me luck. :(

The Big Reveal...

Hubby made it to the appointment yesterday. So no back rubs on demand or yummy dinners out for me. Oh well. He'd probably have been too busy to do any of that anyways. At least for another month. However this does mean that I can tell anyone and everyone what we're having.

Drum Roll Please...

We are having a Boy!!

How fun is that! I just laughed and laughed when I found out. Then I kept saying "What am I going to do with three boys???"

Of course I have no names in mind for a boy. Not a single one. The kids have been shouting out names to me. Joe's suggestion was the most interesting. He thinks we should name the baby "I" because that is the shortest word and it's easy to spell. If it was a girl he thought we should name her "A". Crazy!

A Quick Review

Place Your Bets!

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Tomorrow afternoon is my "official ultrasound" appointment. The one where you have to drink 32 oz. of water then do your best not to die while a technician firmly presses the ultrasound wand all over your abdomen. It's also the one where they tell you (baby's position permitting) if your having a Boy or a Girl. Anyone want to take a guess??? Personally, I am not placing a bet. Being 0-4 kind of puts a damper on the guessing game. The family, who have guessed correctly on occasion, have already put in their opinions. So far the results are 3 Girl, 3 Boy. Cross your fingers that I'll find out who's right tomorrow.

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Hubby's Busy Schedule

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On a side note, even if I do find out what I'm having, I might not tell. Why?? Well, I don't want you to tell Hubby.

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See, Hubby's work is super busy right now and he won't be able to attend the ultrasound. I think this is the first one he'll miss. I love Hubby dearly and can honestly say he's my best friend. However, in our relationship we have a lovely time harassing each other every so often. And now I will have the perfect ammo to get him and get him Good! It will kill him to know that I know the gender and he doesn't. Oooh! I can have such fun. Mwhaha!

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Of course, I might let him earn the knowledge. I'll have to think up something good. Something like back rubs on demand for a month or taking me out for a dinner at some yummy place. ;)

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Morphing Studies

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As part of my Bachelors, I studied marital relationships. In one class, a study was reviewed that claimed the married couples, as they age, grow more and more similar in taste, personality, and appearance. Scary!! I laughed at the time and kind of shuddered to think about morphing into my Hubby. Bur Horror of Horrors!!! The morphing has begun!!! Thankfully it has only reached the taste buds and I'm praying will only last the duration of my pregnancy.

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I have never in my life eaten a Big Mac. I prefer a petite hand-formed patty loaded to the brim with veggies. However, during my first trimester when I was so sick and everything I ate sat wrong, I saw a billboard for a Big Mac and it looked good. I chided myself and kept driving. But a week later, I found myself in the drive-thru ordering a Big Mac. I took it home and ate the entire thing. It was delicious. My tummy and my mouth felt so happy, and my heart felt like crying. I called Hubby practically in tears to confess my grievous behavior. He didn't believe me. When he came home and saw the wrapper, his eyes bugged out of his head. I have since had at least one Big Mac a week. Usually two or three. It's disgusting and delicious all at the same time. I am really at odds with myself. This is definitely Hubby's child.

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Other things I now eat that I didn't eat before:

1) Dill Pickles. I can't get enough. They used to give me heartburn.

2) Mayonnaise. I never used the stuff. Just mustard and a little ranch and I was happy. Now I'm slathering my sandwiches with mayo.

3) Soda or Lemonade with my Big Mac. I never ordered drinks. I always got water. But now I need the sugary junk!

4) Pepperoni Pizza. I always ordered a small veggie pizza for myself. But now I can't eat mushrooms or bell peppers. Those are two of my favorite foods!!! I am so sad. For the first few weeks I kept trying to eat them. Thinking that a different recipe wouldn't make me sick. But no. Mushrooms and bell peppers are no longer my friends. And I miss them. A lot. :(

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I tell you, my taste buds have morphed. Hubby still can't get over me eating a Big Mac. He thinks me eating Mayo is even weirder. He was seriously concerned about my mental state when he saw me slathering that white stuff on a slice of bread. :(

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Tess of the D'Urbervilles

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This book has been on my "to read" list for years. Once I started college, extracurricular reading was put on hold. By the time I started reading for pleasure again, I wanted to read light and happy stories. Life was just too emotionally demanding for me to read anything dark or heavy. I must confess that I become very obsessed when reading. I really get into the stories and become quite invested in the characters. I also notice (and am irritated by) typographical and grammatical errors, inconsistencies in storyline, and other fun stuff like that. Books I have read lately include the Lightening Thief series, re-read the Anne of Green Gables series (except the last book about Rilla...it's sad!), and the ever popular Magic Treehouse, Captain Underpants, and A to Z Mysteries. All fun, light, and easy reads.

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Then I read about Tess. It was AWFUL and INFURIATING!! The writing was superb. The story well-thought out and executed beautifully. It was thoroughly engaging, moved at a nice pace, and had an actual conclusion (something many of today's authors think is optional). The awful part was everything that happened to Tess. Holy Cow!! I don't want to give anything away, so I won't elaborate on the awfulness. Just know that when you read this story you are going to hate a man or two passionately and curse their names every time they appear in their self-righteous glory.
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My kids were laughing at me because every so often I would put the book down and start storming about the room yelling about those awful men. I gave Hubby an earful when he asked me what I was talking about. Lecturing him on the values of a good man and condemning arrogance, self-righteousness, and hypocrisy. He made no further inquiries after that. ;)

The Real Story

Well, we finally dragged the real story out of Miss Q. Hubby was right. She was lying the first time.

The real story is in an attempt to win a friend Miss Q lent the library item to a gal in her class. A gal that she did not know the name of, nor the address nor the phone number. Hubby and I told her she had 24 hours to get the item back and I gave her the death glare while saying this, so she knows we mean business.

As for her money, she has blown it on water bottles and extra lunches at school. Now, please keep in mind that we gave her a GIANT reusable water bottle. All she has to so is take it to school with her. To remember! In addition to the giant one we gave her, she has about seven of her own, in what she calls her "water bottle collection". Aaaah!  I just can't believe she is wasting a dollar a day (sometimes more) on something she could have for free if she just took time to prepare.

And the extra lunches. That's really throwing me for a loop right now. Why??  For a couple reasons.

1) Miss Q claims to hate what is served for lunch. She is constantly complaining about it. How the food is cooked properly. How the juice tastes funky. How one item or another made her want to puke.  And yet she is getting SECONDS???

2) Per doctor's instructions, she is to increase her activity level and decrease her food intake. This part is funny. The gal is about the same size as my nine year old Rose, yet weighs more than me, and Eats more than Hubby! Now I am no bird eater, but for someone to out-eat Hubby, who is a Six foot, Five inch tall, calorie-burning MAN....Well, that is an accomplishment.

Anyhoo, Miss Q was in a heap of trouble for lying. We lectured her and restricted her privileges and told her if she did it again she'd be in for another heap of trouble. The poor girl was freaking out a bit the whole time. She thought Hubby and I were going to yell at her and call her names. I did tell her what she did was dumb, but that she herself isn't dumb. We told her to go to her room and start working on her reading assignments. She then asked, "So, you aren't kicking me out?"

WHAT IN THE WORLD?!?!?!

Hubby and I were floored.

We told her, "Of Course NOT!"  And asked where she would have gotten that idea from. She said it had happened in the past. Hubby told her that she is our daughter right now and we do NOT kick family out. He told her we may have to reprimand you and give you consequences that you don't like, but we will never kick you out.

I have to say, it is amazing what crap these kids go through. I just hope we can make a positive difference in this little gal's life.

Yucky!

Cakes and I delivered the last fundraiser item yesterday evening. Hooray! All the fundraiser items are out of my house. Well, except for the deceased man's cookies. I just don't know what to do with those...

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Anyhoo, after we dropped off the last package, Cakes wanted to keep walking around the block. Fine with me. A little fresh air and exercise is good for the body. He led the way, stopping every so often to watch ants, pick up rocks, or point out birds flying. The funniest stop was at a house that had just thrown down seed for winter grass.

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Cakes: "Eeeww! Poopy!! Yuck! Wook Mom. Poopy!!! Eew Yuck!"

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Me: "That's not poop. That's just fertilizer. Oh, wait..."

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Haha! The kid is right. It was poopy. ;)

Ummm....

Did you ever have a time when you just didn't know quite what to say? I've had a couple today.

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Joe brought a note home from kindergarten, pinned to his shirt so I wouldn't miss it. The note read:

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"Dear Parents: This Friday is 'Crazy Hair' day. If your child wants to have crazy hair, please send in $.50 for a donation to the student council. Feel free to style and have fun. Thank you, Mrs. D."

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That's right. If my child wants to participate he has to pay to do so. And the cost is two whole quarters! That's a lot of money! Since when do you have to pay for Crazy Hair day? And what about Rose? My nine-year old? The one who has refused to wash her hair for a week and has a huge rat's nest in the back that I'm just too tired to fight about some mornings? Will she be charged for her crazy hair? On second thought, that might actually be a good thing for Rose... I'll have to think about that.

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Earlier this evening, I was talking to my foster daughter, Miss Q, about her monthly allowance (provided by the state that I'm required to give per some rule or another). There are some activities coming up that she'd like to attend and some things she'd like to buy. Hubby and I had talked to her about money, budgeting, saving, etc., last month when we gave her the allowance. Apparently, nothing we talked about sunk in.

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Discussing the cost of things she wants to do, I told her that she would have to pay for some things. I then asked how much of her money she had in savings from last month. "None" was the response. I was shocked! She has not brought anything into the home purchase wise. Her meals at school are paid for as are all her expenses living with me. I asked what happened to her money. I got one of those mumbled "idontknow" shrugs. After twenty minutes of dragging her feet I finally had an explanation of sorts.

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She had borrowed a CD from the library a couple months ago, failed to return it, and owed fines. She gave the CD and $15 to some kid who she had never met before and whose name she did not know to return the CD for her and pay the fine. Can you see the points in this story where this Mom's jaw dropped? If not, no worries. I will gladly list them for you:

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1) I ask this kid every week if she has anything that needs to be returned to the library and her answer every week is "no". When I pointed this out, her reply was that she had borrowed it from the downtown and didn't know if it could be returned to the main branch. Excuse me??? Why didn't you tell me? To that question I got another mumbled "idontknow" shrug.

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2) She gave a stranger, a stranger!, an item that did not belong to her and her money! When she shared that bit of info, I had to stop and take a few deep breaths before proceeding. At which point I asked her to think, really think, about what she just said and whether or not she thought that was a "good idea". Dear Heavenly Father, please grant me patience with this girl!!!

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3) Fifteen dollars for a fine. Seriously?? What was she thinking? That amount would be high as a replacement fee, let alone a late fine. And again, she gave her money to a stranger. A Stranger!!!

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I called Bull on her a couple times during her story. But she insists that this is what really happened. I just can't decide if she's lying or if she's really that dumb. Hubby thinks she's lying.

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The last episode occurred about fifteen minutes ago. My kids participated in their school's PTA fundraiser sale. The stuff that they sold came in today, so I have spent the afternoon and evening calling our neighbors who purchased items to make sure they're home, then taking the items to the neighbors. One man's phone number wasn't working. An automated message told me that it had either been "changed, disconnected, or is no longer in service." Huh? The guy just ordered stuff in September.

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I got online to see if an updated number was listed there. I found one and called it. A woman answered the phone and when I asked for the guy she evasively said, "He's not around anymore." Huh? In that brief second I figured that he wasn't home and she didn't recognize my number and so didn't want to give out too much info. So I explained that I was calling because my child had gone door to door in the neighborhood and had sold the guy some cookie dough. I asked if she had an idea where he was so we could deliver it to him. Her reply: "He's deceased. He died in September."

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My compassionate response: "Ummm.....Wow. I'm sorry for your loss. So, umm...do you want the cookie dough? 'Cause I can bring it over, if your home..."

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